the signs being rich

Aries: “im going to every concert ever. i bought all of itunes. no one can stop me”
Taurus: saves most of money but throws huge fuckin parties every Friday with Nicki Minaj
Gemini: “what if i bought a boat and invited people on my boat only to tell them to get the fuck off my boat”
Cancer: “I’ve bought 10 dogs already today. tomorrow I buy the worlds population of cats”
Leo: buys own island and names it after themselves and everyone who lives there are dogs and friends no one else ever
Virgo: “i made a blog to update people on my rich life. i just booked Beyoncé for my birthday party”
Libra: millionaire by age 20 and takes the lyrics “im gonna swing from my chandelier” too seriously
Scorpio: finally subscribes to hulu plus
Sagittarius: wears black lace Elie Saab designer gown with necklace of diamonds and walks slowly down spiral staircases
Capricorn: buys 3 summer homes and a castle while on their private jet
Aquarius: “im going to buy the five oceans. i am Poseidon”
Pisces: “i filled my pool with champagne and now i don’t know what to do”